First, I have to give a 100 to the one and only Charlie Sheen. This has to be the hottest celeb on the planet right now and rightfully so, simply because this dude has given the entire world something to laugh at. I guarantee if you are having a tore up day, just follow @CharlieSheen on Twitter and everything will be okay.
But what I don’t understand is the bashing and media hate of good ol’ Charlie. If anything he should be PRAISED for his honesty and contributions to society as we know it.
Here are 5 things the world would have been deprived of if there was never a Charlie Sheen:
- TV and Movie classics like Spin City, Red Dawn and Major League. (He should have won 3 Oscars for playing the intense and riveting role of Rick “Wild Thing” Vaughn, but that’s another story.)
- That you can live after smoking 7 gram “cocaine rocks”. He has singlehandedly given the “Future Crackheads of America” something to aspire for. (BTW, is it called “cocaine rocks” in Hollywood and “crack rocks” everywhere else????) Living proof that a person can be “high” and a “winner” at the same time.
- He showed us that all you need is Tiger Blood and Adonis DNA to get you a porn star and a weed head to move in your house and help spend all your money. Hopefully, 1.2 million an episode for Two and a Half Men will last you a few years with those two on your payroll. If not, he must be on some Sexual Chocolate type stuff like Randy Watson from Coming to America.
- And finally... we now know that some women actually accept checks as a payment method for sex. Oh here’s the proof courtesy of TMZ:
This dude was bold enough (or high enough) to write a CHECK for the BOOTIE??? Notice that he made it out to CASH, probably because the chick didn’t have a bank account. Try taking that to the check cashing place, and I bet you better come with 22 forms of ID and a stool sample.
Suddenly I hear the voice of Whitney Houston "Crack is Wack".
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